21 Day Meditation Challenge...

Look at me!
3 blogs pretty close together eh?

I have been meaning to write about this but as with anyone, life happens.

A few weeks ago - pretty much the Month of March - I did the Oprah/Deepak Chopra 21 Day Meditation Challenge.  I had seen a couple of my friends share the link on FB and when I looked into it, it sounded pretty cool.  It was free and I'm always looking to improve my body, mind and soul.  I also have more time on my hands so I figured - why not!

I did quite well too.  I only missed maybe 2 nights, but actually made them up at different times.  What it basically was, was you signed into your account and Oprah yapped for a minute then Deepak Chopra comes on.  He then talks about whatever subject is that day.  These ranged from diet to exercise to soul searching to kindness to all sorts of things.  There would be the phrase of the day, the yogi/meditation and then what the meditation means or symbolizes.  I wrote them all down each day, so I do have record of them.  Then Deepak would begin a guided meditation with you with trippy yogi music playing in the background.  He would then talk briefly, getting you "centered" then leave you be with the music and your own meditation.  A soft gong would ring about 10 minutes later, he spoke for a few more seconds then you were done.  Afterwards there was a little daily journal you could fill out.  I missed the deadline to print this out, but I don't recall writing anything too deep.

I really found myself enjoying these.  There were nights I didn't want to do it, but more often than not I would happily dive in.  I always did mine at night before bed.  I would have my face washed, PJ's on and ready to crash. I would  then pop on my laptop, throw a hankerchief over it to dull the glow and curl up on the couch in the best criss-cross position I could muster with my screwy hip and angry knee. 

I am not a good meditator.  I'm sure you all find this shocking.  My mind wanders a mile a minute and having 2 cats doesn't help.  (One night Tweaks leaped up on my shoulder scaring the shit out of me and giving me a mild heartattack.  Needless to say my meditation was shot that night).  I also found I always seemed to try this when Disneyland was shooting off it's fireworks.  My new place - LOUD.

But - I did my best.  I was pleasantly surprised to find a few nights where I actually got into a pretty decent calm.  Those were the nights that the meditation actually seemed too short.  It was like "Damn - I was just getting there!'  This gives me hope though that I may actually be able to pull this off once in awhile.

What did I learn?  Not too much, but I did find I seemed to sleep better at night.  I also have decided I want to try to incorporate meditation into my life on a more regular basis.  I know I won't do it every night, Hell, I haven't even tried once since the challenge ended but I'm going too, tonight, and I'm going to try some different methods.  I have an album on my ipod that a yogi friend of mind loves and it's yoga like music.  So I want to try and just sit in silence with that music and see if I can do this.  I'm not sure it will help but I'm confident it will do something.

I was pleased to hear one of my friends who did it is still doing it.  She said she has found she's calmer and more focused in life.  One of the days had this mantra: My little changes amount to big benefits.  The meditation is Ram, Ram, Ram which was one of my favorites.  That mantra has really stuck with me lately.  I've been keeping up with my metas or affirmations in the shower in the mornings, I'm trying to eat better - no diet - just small changes, I'm keeping active and trying to do things I enjoy, not that I HAVE to do.  Nothing major - all small.  I am noticing little differences.  I want to start noticing big changes and I think I will if I keep trying new things.  I really want to find my balance and live a life of perfect health!

SO - in conclusion - I'm really glad I did it.  I truly do believe if you sit in silence, whether meditating or not, but just chill for a little bit, once a day - you will be happier.

Baseball...

I love sports.

I do.

I used to play them.  I'm still very active.  I'd like to say I'm not that competitive of a person, but that would be a lie.  I will admit I'm not as angry/competitive as I used to be, but I still am quite competitive.  Usually with myself.  This happens when I watch sports as well.  I forget this is the case until I go to a game.

Like last week.

My dear friend Tully had fancy baseball tickets from his company.  He invited a couple that are good friends of his and me.  The gal had to back out last minute so we invited our friend Dave who is an avid Angels fan.  Now, I am a Cubbie fan 1st.  I know.  But it's a hard fact.  I'm an Angels fan 2nd.  I'm not one of those sports fans who watches them on TV all the time.  I keep abreast of my favorite teams and how they are doing, but that's about it.  BUT, I do love a good live sporting event.  So I was so excited to go and have such awesome seats.

We arrived early and when we walked into the Diamond Club I squealed with excitement.  The boys were laughing at me the whole time, but I am never quiet about my excitement.  Our seats were fucking amazing.  I have never had such awesome seats for a ballgame.  I didn't even need my glasses.  Take a look at this:

I was so friggin excited!!!!  So we got to our seats quite early and had a waiter!!!  That's right - a dude actually served us!  I ordered a wine, which was actually good wine, and a giant hot dog (which I promptly regretted later) and of course some peanuts.  I'm mean what's a ballgame without peanuts!  Now, I admit, this is not the way I usually watch baseball.  I actually am annoyed with Angels stadium because there's a waterfall and weird sponsorships everywhere and little girls shooting T-shirts, etc.  My experience at Wrigley Field years ago was a real baseball experience and my favorite to date.  But - it's nice to see how the 1% live once in a while.  So, I savored every second.  Here was our crew:  Me and the boys.  I'd also like to point out the hilarious little photo bombing girl in the back:

The game got underway after many sponsorship plus and I found myself getting super invested.  There were a couple of old guys behind me - an Angels and A's fan, so it was hilarious to listen to the 2 of them all night.  Sadly the Angels played like shit.  I didn't know who the pitcher was but was heartbroken it wasn't the cute one!  Le sigh.  He sucked.  As did the kid that replaced him later.  Harris (don't recall the 1st name) who played shortstop was awful.  He missed so many easy balls that he should have had.  I found myself screaming from my seat and getting quite angry.  Oooooohhhh, that's right - I'm competitive!  The boy were cracking up at me the entire time.  I'm so glad I can still always entertain.  There was also a short fellow who you think would run fast, but no.  Every time he hit, he got out at 1st base.  I turned to David and shouted.  "Why is he running so slowly!!!!!?” 

Anywhoo - this was me the whole game.

Some interesting happenings - a foul ball got hit and came over the net - right at us.  Normally I would try to catch it, but after the whole June incident I found myself diving for cover while everyone around me jumped for the ball.  It bounced off Ed's hand and into the hands of the jackasses next to us who were only there for 2 innings.

Another foul ball ricocheted off the level above us, then off the wall in front and slammed into a poor woman's face.  Blood spurted from her mouth and security came running down.  Poor lady.  She seemed to be ok, and more mortified by the spectacle being made.  I about died when a kid who looked to be about 15 years old showed up with an oxygen tank.  "Just get the poor women some ice!" I shouted.  I watched her sign her life away (I guess that's a big ol deal now a days) and then she was ok.  The funnier thing - the gal who was singing the take me out to the ballgame song ended up standing in front of the poor face women.  Here's the camera guy and the singer and the poor bloodied woman just trying to go unnoticed.  I couldn't help but laugh.  All the crap happening outside the game was way more interesting than the game itself.

The Angels were slaughtered but deserved it.  And I was reminded how much of a sports fan I really am.  I had so much fun and just absolutely love watching a live game, no matter what sport - nothing beats live!!! 





Warrior Dash 2013

3rd year down.
This time the race meant something completely different.


April 6th, 2013.  Here it was again.  The Warrior Dash.  The race that started our kick into signing up for all kinds of random 5K's that have some sort of interesting element to them, usually obstacles.  Our usual crew: Tully, Julie, Court, D and I were in and a newbie this year named Holly.

The girls drove together and Tully and I headed out together.  6:30 Sat morning, Tully arrived at my door and off we went with a rather large mug of coffee.  We flew there with no traffic.  I found that I was a little nervous this time.  Tully assured me that I would kick my usual ass and to remember to take it easy.  I still found that my stomach was a bit jittery than normal.  We arrived way to early and it was way too cold, and we found ourselves milling around the area since the check in had not yet opened. It seemed the Dash crew didn't quite have it together. 

We finally were able to check in, they had my birthday wrong, sent me to information where no one was and I was starting to get a bit annoyed.  Finally a surfer like chick showed up, got it squared away and we were ready to go.  We found the girls and took advantage of the no one around to snap some photos at the Warrior Dash sign.  This proved to be a brilliant idea since after the race the line was never more than at least 30 deep.  Back to our cars to shed our warm clothes, drop off our goodies and get in gear.



We gathered at the starting line, start stretching and prepping Holly and I found myself getting nervous and excited.  An interesting encounter happened when Julie asked who was running with who.  (Tully and Julie are amazing runners and always kill it and meet us after).  D stated her and the other 2 were staying together which put me alone.  I was perfectly fine with this since the race meant a lot more to me than they realized.  The man revved us up and the fire was shot up and off we went.  I did my usual - trot until my knee swells and the pain starts to shoot up my leg.  This works out well since there is always a big group at the start and eventually weens off. I always trot to the right and start my power walk when my knee begins to go.  I've come to terms with the fact that most people will pass me at this point, but funny enough I usually pass them later on.

Once my power walk began, and most people had passed me up, I set in to my usual pace.  The girls passed me up but I met back up with them on the 1st few obstacles.  For awhile we were playing the game of, they pass me on the course, I pass them on the obstacles.  The 1st few obstacles I honestly don't remember, but I do remember the one I lost the girls on.  There were mud hills then you drop into water, then up a mud hill, drop into water, etc.  Four times.  Great.  Water already.  So in I go.  Yet I realize no one is able to climb up the mud hill.  It's like scrambling in one place.  The guy in front of me swished aside and said "You try".  It wasn't happening.  So, we mosied over to the side where you could grab the lip and help yourself over.  Once I figured that out I passed up a bunch of people and onto my pace again.

Here's the thing.  I am not a runner.  Mostly due to my knee injury but even if I didn't have that, I'm no runner.   But - I'm strong.  I will smoke you on the obstacles :)  So, when I popped out of the water and started up my power walk pace again, this is where I started to pass people.  The 3 girls also never caught back up with me.  I was a little surprised but also secretly stoked.  Look at me go!  So - I was now totally alone.  Off I went.  Loving every second.

Next we came to a balance beam like obstacle.  I was surprised to see so many people inching along.  It wasn't that thin.  I hopped on the empty one and sailed across.  Next up was a cargo net thing you walked under.  Now, it was a bit of a bitch by yourself, but a darling little gal and me teamed up and powered right through. 

That was awesome.  Next up was another balance beam like obstacle.  Sailed past everyone.  Now - my moment of triumph was when I approached the rope wall.  It was a big wall with ropes that you had to climb up, then you climbed down the other side.  Using only the rope.  There were about 8 across so I stood down by the 1st one and was surprised to see so many people struggling.  Was it hard? I wondered?  Am I not seeing something?  I thought.  I also noticed a few marine looking guys having issues.  So, I grabbed my rope and up I went like a monkey.  I heard a bunch of people yelling "Look at the pink girl go!!!" (I was wearing a hot pink tank).  I beamed with pride then scaled down the other side.  One of the marine fellows was on the ground and stopped me.  "Do you rock climb?" he asked.  "No" I laughed.  "You are all just a bunch of pussies!"  He roared and his friends laughed.  It was awesome.  And off my little power walk went.  Then it hit me.  The pressure in my head.  I stopped.  Held it.  Rubbed it.  I'm ok.  I'm ok.  But, that was a scary little moment.  Ease up Jami.

Later on they passed me and shouted "Yay!  It's the hard core pink girl!!!"  I felt like a million dollars.  Then I walked what seemed like forever with no obstacles.  I realized I had passed up a bunch of people and they hadn't passed me back up. I found myself chuckling chanting "Slow and steady wins the race!"  Along the course was a random photographer.  So I liked the pic and I bought it.  Yes.  I am a dork.

Then I found myself rounding the bin where the lake is.  I saw the big water slide that I loved last year, but as I got closer realized you walked up it, not slid down it.  Um ok.  That was lame.  I also noticed there were no lake obstacles at all.  WTF?!  Then I saw the fire and the finish line up ahead.  Man.  I was super disappointed this year in the obstacles.  There were barely any and they really weren't all that challenging.  Oh well.  So, I power walked towards the fire.  



Here it comes.  I thought.  My moment.  My jumping over the fire.  My triumph over conquering the hemorrhage.  Of surviving.  I started to get nervous again.  As I approached the fire my body ignited.  I was so excited. So happy.  So grateful to be here.  To be doing this again.  I was beaming when I approached the fire.  I saw the photographers and laughed out loud and shouted out with excitement as I made the leap!

It was amazing.  Then came the mud.  I dove in like usual, ready to power through it, and bam.  Halt.  The mud was thicker than it's ever been.  There was actually a tractor scooping out some of it as we went through it which was random, but it was nuts!  People were panicking, getting stuck, sinking, it was gnarly.  Some people actually had to get pulled out because they were freaking out so much.  The guys in front of me kept stopping and getting stuck which would make me sink.  I started to panic slightly thinking I'm never going to get through this.  I noticed no one was in the middle.  I knew why because there was nothing to grab on to.  Dare I?  I did.  I went into the middle and powered past everyone.  It was a bit scary and really intense, but I did it.  I dragged myself out and literally dragged myself across the finish line.  The picture succession is hilarious. If they weren't so expensive I would have bought them all.  You basically watched me exhausted dragging across the finish, notice the camera, start to look up and finish with the one I did buy:



As the guy medaled me, I shouted "Fucking Mud!!!!"  The guy roared.  Tully and Julie were waiting for me and praising me on how amazing I did.  How they were just chatting and Julie spotted my tank and shrieked "Holy shit there she is!"  Once I caught my breath I looked up at Tully. He put his hand on my shoulder and smiled.  "You did it!".  I started to cry.  Julie embraced me and it was all over.  I tried to hold back the tears but there was no way.  I  felt amazing.  I did it.  I'm back.  And I'm back almost full bore.  The emotions running through me at that moment are indescribable. 

I headed off to the lake to rinse off while Tully and Julie waited for the others.  When I lay down in the water I floated for a moment and smiled up into the universe.  I did it.  Walking out I ran into the girls coming down.  "I'm so proud of you!!!" Court shouted.  The tears started to return.

We all parted back to our cars to change and couldn't stop smiling.  I fucking did it.

We all met back up in the beer garden, laughing, sharing stories and drinking beer.  Well - I drank Gatorade.  Holly did great.  Tully ended up being 1st in his age group and 20th overall.  There were a total of about 5,000 runners.  He was 20th.  Yes.  He is bad ass.  Julie placed 8th in our age group and 48th over all.  Again.  BAD.  ASS.  I actually completed the race in 51 minutes and placed 1,175 over all.  That's right.  Top 20%!!!!!!!!  It was also a bit over 3 miles.  Julie figured it to be closer to 4.  When we found out our times Tully turned to me and said "You're not only back, your killing it darling!"  I couldn't believe it.

It felt so good.  So good to be back here.  Conquering this.  Sharing it with the people I love.  Coming back to this is just amazing.  I've signed up for a bunch more this year, and can't wait for all of them.  Although in general the Warrior Dash this year was a bit of a let down - it doesn't matter.  What it meant to me was I'm back.  I survived and I kicked it's fucking ass.  Grateful doesn't even begin to describe it.

That's right I survived.
Fuck yeah.

Good Friday...

Today is Good Friday.  And it is just that.  Good.



I have the day off and figured why not visit my old friend the BlogSpot.  I realize I haven't been blogging as much as I used to, but I've also figured I've been doing a bunch of other stuff that you readers don't know about. 



Are there readers?

I wonder that sometimes.  Who out there is reading my pointless ramblings on the internet.  I of course know a few, my faithful friends, who seem to like to read my silliness.  My dad used too, but I think my horrific grammar has turned him away.  Sadly I write like I talk.  Punctuation?  Paragraphs?  Unnecessary.  I'm also a horrible speller.  My favorite word I miss spell is forward.  I usually leave out the 1st r.  ALL THE TIME.  Because that's how I say it. Ha!  Anywhoo...I'm rambling.



Notice I'm trying to make more paragraphs?  I went to a grammar workshop the other day and although it was more focused towards business writing, not blogging, I figured I'd try to improve here.  We'll see how long that lasts.  Sorry dad :)



So - an update on what I've been doing and how I've been feeling post hemorrhage.  That's how I like to refer to things now.  Pre hemorrhage and post hemorrhage.  Since I have officially become a cliché and my perspective on life has completely changed, I figure why not?  It's an interesting place this post hemorrhage.  It's happier.  More relaxed.  More grateful.  More open to trying new things.  Oh and by the way - did I mention I'm blogging on my spankin new laptop?  It's a shift (Windows 8, Office 2000 something in the future) but it's mine.  Thank you again daddy! 



Let's start with my fitness.  I haven't stopped.  I love it.  Boxing Burn Mon/Wed/Sat.  Bowling Tuesdays and Zumba Fridays.  I'm usually on a hike or a walk with a friend Sunday mornings and my new pad is a good walk from the Orange Circle and the local Saturday morning Farmers Market.  I love it.  I still have to be careful due to the tumor (more on that later) but I would say I'm pretty much back full speed.  The difference now, though, is I'm not obsessed.  I work out to feel good, not to look good.  Yes - I really do want this damn muffin top to move along, but it's just not the same.  Every work out I do, I think to myself, "I am so lucky and grateful that I am able to do this."  Because I am.  I recovered like a champ.  It really does seem forever ago that I was laid up, and crying, and recovering, and wondering if the pain in my back and head would ever go away, and yearning to be outside in the summertime, and feeling so guilty and embarrassed that friends had to bring me food and come visit me while I was in bed flinching at every move.  That's over.  I've also signed up for 4 races and excited for them all.  Warrior Dash in a week, ROC race in May, Run for your Lives (as a zombie) in Sept and Rugged Maniac in Oct.  I'm not going to lie - I'm a bit nervous for Warrior Dash. This will be my 1st race back, but finishing it will now have a whole new meaning I think.



Next up we have the mind.  I'm doing the Deepak Chopra 21 day meditation challenge.  I'll do a separate blog on that later, but I'm enjoying it.  I also say my "metas" every morning and am trying to bring more acts of kindness into my regular routine.  I've also sparked up an awesome ongoing dialogue with an amazing friend of mine about faith.  More on that later as well.  Still working out how I feel about that one, but I am actually getting somewhere I think.



Lastly - food.  This one is tough.  I consider myself a pretty healthy eater for the most part.  I don't drink soda, don't eat fast food, limit my sweets, etc.  But the lingering muffin top makes me question that there's still something I'm missing.  I've always hated vegetables.  I put kale or spinach in my smoothies to get some sort of green in my diet, but that has always been a toughie.  Well - for some reason, I seem to me more willing to try stuff.  Again - I chalk it up to post hemorrhage.  My friend Cesar, who makes me dinner sometimes, God love him, got me to eat cauliflower.  Now - I'll eat cauliflower if it's cold and I can dip it in ranch or something.  Well, he did something do it that made it like mashed potatoes and it had garlic (love) and onion (love) and it was amazing!!!!  I also have another friend of mine, who is a phenomenal cook and has started a new business with her hubs that makes organic healthy food for you to pick up weekly.  And there's a drop off in Orange!!!!!  So, once I realized how easy it actually was - pick out however many or less meals you want, order online, mail them a check, bam - healthy food available for pick up just down the street.  She even got me to eat brussel sprouts!!!!!!  www.bitemekitchen.com is the place.  I advise you check them out.  Another funny thing, I hate broccoli.  We went to lunch yesterday for a co-workers birthday and there was broccoli in my wok chicken thing I ordered.  Guess what - I ATE IT!  It had enough sauce on it that it was yummy!!!  So - who knows - I may eat my vegetables regularly yet.  My next step is cutting back on my carbs, which is tough because I love me some bread and pasta, but I'm going to try.  But, again, I'm not obsessed.  I love food and I will always enjoy it.  But I seem to be finding healthier ways too do so, which is awesome.



So here we are.  I've had to adjust my life slightly due to the schwanoma.  Little bastard.  I still have random nausea attacks that we THINK is positional, but not sure.  So I try to be careful.  I'm so friggin aware of how I turn my head, stand up, bend over, what I watch on TV shaky wise, ANYTHING that I think may set it off.  So all you folks trying to be more aware of your body - wait till you have something that will knock you on your ass unexpectedly and it's fascinating how aware you become.  I'm not one for meds, but I finally landed at my primary doctor to get something to try when one of these attacks happen.  It's an anti-nausea drug of sorts that hopefully will help curtail when one of these happen.  They don't happen often, so that is the blessing, but I'm hoping I'm more prepared now if one comes.  Next January will be another MRI to see what is next.  But in the meantime I have a new approach now on hand if one of these happens.  Well in my purse anyway.



So there it is in a nutshell.  I'm also journaling a bit a night, treating myself to a pedi now and then, loving my new little pad, soaking up time with loved ones, just enjoying life.  Still waiting for that fabulous man to show up, but he will.  I know it.  I'm still seeing hearts ;)



It's weird when your outlook changes, I move slower, enjoy moments more, get angry less, smile easily and laugh a lot.  I thought my life was already like that before, and it was a bit, I was on a path that was going in that direction, but I've landed there now.  I feel my purpose in life is to make people laugh, to smile and hopefully inspire.  Bizarre ya?  But cool.

My Birthday

So I’m finally getting around to writing about my birthday! I would like to say I’m doing this on my brand spankin new laptop, but I’m still trying to figure out how to work the thing. Le sigh. I am no techie that’s for damn sure.


Anywhoo – My birthday! For weeks I have been going back and forth on what to do. Since the whole head thing last year I feel I need to grasp every moment and hang onto it because I don’t know when it will happen again. I am so grateful to be here and felt I should certainly celebrate! I used to throw myself birthday parties all the time, as well as Halloween parties, Xmas parties, themed parties etc. But I must admit, as I’ve gotten older and broker I’ve backed away from throwing as many because they are just exhausting and a bit pricy. Some years I have ignored my birthday not wanting to acknowledge the fact that I’ve turned yet another year older and not moved forward in life at all. These were of course in my more depressing years. But this year it’s different! Now, it’s not a special number – 37 – not exciting – but still. I’m alive. So began the anxiety of what I should do. I’m moved into a fab new little pad and really wanted to have people over, but unfortunately my summer loving ass was born in the coldest part of winter and it would be outside because my place is too small. Plus I was going to a matinee show that day and wouldn’t have much time to set up, etc. My bday fell on a Sat night, meaning I wanted to do something even more but the thought of going anywhere on a Saturday night just made me cringe. I thought of a dinner, but know I’m the type to worry that everyone will pay enough and enough of a tip and I didn’t want to assume someone would pay for me but would they because I’m broke and on and on and on as my mind tends to do sometimes. I also was hesitant to have people over due to the fact that I have no money right now and I’m known for my parties and I can’t spend anything so this literally would have to be a “You bring me food and booze” party. Sigh. I’m exhausting just re-typing what my head was doing a month prior February 23rd. Which is what happened about a week before. I finally said fuck it and sent a text to some closer friends inviting them over for a mellow chill night to celebrate m bday and did a FB post day of. Keri had a fire pit and mom was bringing a heater so let’s just do it. And so came to be one of the best birthdays I’ve ever had!

I woke up and went to my Boxing Burn. Kris made me work harder as a happy birthday, which I love. I came home showered and got prettied up go see Wicked. My boss had given me her 2 subscription seats and I was bringing my friend Susan who was obsessed with the show. All throughout the day I was trying to keep up with my fabulous FB bday wishes and phone calls and texts, smiling giddily at each one. When we arrived, Susan promptly bought us drinks and booked our drinks for intermission. Our seats were incredible! This was our view:

The show was fun. I wasn’t blown away, but did enjoy it for sure. The little gal who was Glinda had me in stiches with her physical comedy and the green witch had an incredible voice that gave me chills at times. Susan was in tears many times and the part where the girlfriends are singing to each other that they are better people since they have each other in their lives I took Susan’s hand and we cried together. I mean we have been friends for like 30 years or something. When the show was over Susan asked me if I wanted socks or a raffle ticket for my bday present. I was thinking the socks, but we passed a stand that was overcharging people to take this silly photo. Since it was dorky and a photo I opted for this instead:

I rushed home and bundled up and people began to arrive. Many bottles of wine and some presents were brought. Food and love as well. I ended up with about 30/40 folks coming and going. At one point I stood by myself and looked over the many different little groups chatting and laughing together and it hit me. I bring people together. I’m one of the few people in our world of friends that crosses over into so many different groups – family, theater, kickball, bowling, work, childhood pals, etc. I realize why so many people love to come to my gatherings – they get to see people they don’t get to see all the time. As I was realizing this, Mel came up to me and gave me a big hug. “I’m so glad I came and got see everyone! I haven’t seen Norm in ages!”

And there it was.

Later in the evening T, Susan and Robin pulled me inside to open their gifts which included a gorgeous Calvin Klein sweater, a photo collage of my now teenage godson and me and of course – Wicked socks. Sneaky Susan. As the last two girls stumbled into their ride home (they got picked up, no drunk driving) I returned to my new little pad and cleaned up, opened all my cards and set out all my goodies. It was 12:45 at night and I started to cry. I am so grateful. I went to bed with a huge smile on my face. It was the perfect birthday.

PS Did I mention I ended up with 11 bottles of wine, even though we drank 7 at the party!

The next day it didn’t end, I headed to my grandparents to visit and get my present that my gramma was itching to give me. I spent time with them and even got a smile out of my Papa when I teased him that he had an almost 40 year old granddaughter. “No! “he shouted with a twinkle in his eye. He held my hand with tears in his eyes and told me he loved me more than I will ever know. I smiled through my tears and kissed his forehead. Next stop was my dad’s. He and Lori had come to my shin dig but my present from him was a laptop. He wanted to take me to buy one. YAY!!!!!! At the cash register at Fry’s I broke down again. “Are you crying?” my dad asked laughing. “Yes” I muttered. “Stupid head explosion has made me a sap”. “Are they tears of joy?” he asked. “Yes” I said trying to wipe them away. “Then good. Happy Birthday Honey”.

Now I have the task of figuring out Windows 8, how to move my iTunes over and what kind of free photo program I should download so I can re-size my pictures. Oh lord. Ha ha!!!

So that’s that. My perfect birthday weekend. I am so very lucky. So very loved. So very grateful to have so many wonderful friends and family in my life. Thank you.

A little catholic humor...

So it seems appropriate on this Ash Wednesday to share this story that will probably make most religious folks help pave my road to hell. But I was sharing this story today with a co-worker and she laughed hysterically. Then I realized that the people I have shared this with always seem to laugh. So – since I love to make people laugh, here’s a portion of my memoir I will someday write on my life that you may find funny or you may want to send me straight to hell.


My best friend is catholic. She doesn’t really practice as much now, but when we were kiddies growing up her family was very very catholic. Whenever I would knock on her door to ask if she could come out and play my timing was always the worst and would land right smack when they were doing their daily rosary thing. It was this video they watched and they held their beads and chanted Hail Mary like things along with said video. Every damn time I would knock, realize what they were doing, try to turn and run, her boisterous happy father would shout “Jami!!!!! Come in and do the rosary with us!” and yank me by my shirt sleeve, sit me down on the cold ripped up leather couch, hand me some beads and there I was. Stuck again. I would shoot my bestie looks as she silently giggled at the fact that I was getting sucked into this crap again.

Come her communion, I think it was called. We were teens and I had gone to church a bit when I was younger and was aware of the passing around of the crackers and grape juice sometimes during church. I loved this part. Free snack! Of course I was in. But I had gone to a Presbyterian church. Much more chill then the more hardcore religions out there. So bestie had invited me to go to this communion thing of hers. She had gone to classes and this was the sort of graduation I guess. Anywhoo, I arrived alone and sat in the back since I was late. Her family was all up front and probably would have saved me from this sinful move I’m about to tell you if they were sitting next to me and could have warned me.

Here goes – So after the million yearlong service of the man in the robes droning on about the bible there was a portion where everyone got up and got in line in front of the priest fellow. I sat there for a while, but when it was obvious that I was the only one not getting in line and I was getting angry looks from the people in line. So I thought “Maybe I’m supposed to do this as well as an audience member”. So I stepped in line. I was watching the people get a cracker looking thing from the man, then stepping next to this other guy and taking a drink from a big gold goblet. “OH!!!! This is the catholic form of snack time!” I thought to myself. Awesome, as my stomach was starting to growl anyway. I noticed the people would cup their hands a certain way and the priest would put the cracker in their hand and they would both say something. I kept trying to hear what they were saying but not able to. So my turn came. I cupped my hands like everyone else and he put the cracker in my hand. “Thanks man!” I said and promptly ate the cracker. It was nasty. It was sort of like a cardboard wafer. Nothing like the salty good mini crackers we used to get when I was a kid! I made a face and the priest cocked his head to the right with a slightly curious look in his eyes. I moved onto the drink person and took a big swig to wash out the nasty fake cracker taste. The drink man didn’t look as curious but more annoyed at me. I smiled and said “Thanks! ” As I turned to return to my seat I see some of the besties family looking at me mortified and mouthing “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”. I shrugged and sat down and did my best to stay awake for the remainder of the show.

Well. I come to find out later it’s pretty much blasphemy to take communion at a catholic church if you are not catholic. My bestie was mortified when she found out but laughed her ass off at the same time. When she asked me why on earth I would think to do this, I told her that everyone else got up and did it and they were all looking at me like the jackass so I thought I was supposed to. I didn’t want to embarrass her at her graduation. She just laughed and shook her head. Even though her mom wouldn’t speak to me for months after that, swearing I had committed a heinous crime, I thought it was funny. Her mom got over it. God didn’t strike me down with lighting or something when I ate my snack. The priest seemed more curious than mad and now it seems to make for a funny story.

I will tell you this though, I was invited to another catholic event of my friends baby getting the water splooshed on his head party and when everyone got up to get there snack and looked at me with menacing eyes, I just sat back and ate my granola bar and thought “I KNOW I’m not supposed to eat your nasty cracker so move on!”

Just some funnies...

So sometimes I like to share random happenings that may make you laugh or smile at my expense. I do sometimes believe that I was put on this earth to entertain so here ya go!

Warning: This 1st bit may be a bit graphic. So I was cutting a bagel a couple of weeks ago with my new paring knife from Fresh & Easy. I was wondering to myself if it’s a good one and BAM. Sliced the shit out of my thumb. I mean the kind of slice that blood gushes out of like a dam burst and it looks like your thumb now has a mouth. I run to the bathroom getting blood everywhere and hold it under cold water. As I’m trying with my good hand to get the Neosporin and band aids out, this is turning into a comic routine. Applying pressure, washing the gushing wound, trying to get a band aid open and on as well as the Neosporin with one hand is not easy. I succeeded. It took a few days of tight band aids to get the wound to start to heal. I actually think I probably should have gotten stiches but we seem to be ok now. On to funnier part – so this past Saturday morning, I’m cutting a bagel again with the very sharp paring knife from Fresh & Easy and I say out loud to my cats “Boy, I hope I don’t slice my finger again!” Before the word again is out of my mouth followed by a chuckle – BAM! I slice the damn finger AGAIN!!!!!! I couldn’t believe it. I screamed out loud to the girls “THAT JUST FUCKING HAPPENED!” as I’m running to the bathroom to rein act a few weeks prior’s comic routine. Luckily this cut wasn’t as gnarly, but I have two – yes two – slices on my thumb now right next to each other. Awesome.

So I’ve moved into a new pad, and I’m getting used to the new sounds. I keep hearing these rat-tat-tat noises on my roof. The girls and I both hear them, so I’m not hallucinating. WTF! It’s at all hours. I have found out there is a squirrel that likes to climb in the giant tree over my house and drop these pod things on my roof. Bastard.

There is apparently a college house a few houses down from me. It’s either a frat house or just a house with college boys, but there have already been a couple of large parties. The 1st one was during the day, and ended early it seemed. But the other one was HUGE. I came home late one Sat when apparently the cops had just broken it up. There were hundreds of kids walking down my street shouting and drinking. Luckily it was breaking up, so that didn’t last long, but when the hell did parties get so epic? Tying to this – a few days later I met our neighbor. She stopped by my house to introduce herself and I believe she is quite excited about gossip, or just really excited to tell me this: “So YOU know we had that awful party the other night right?!” I nod “Well, my son went out after it broke up to get something from his car and there was a couple HAVING SEX ON KAREN’S LAWN! Just right there in the open her ass straight up in the air! Can you believe it! Cars drive by, they don’t care!” I wasn’t sure if I was more in awe by the actual sex event or the fact that this is how she introduces herself to me.

And my last little tidbit is a bit corny and I am probably going to come off as a freak – but I’m really hoping it’s a sign. So you know I put my request for a man out there a few blogs back. Well I’m now seeing hearts everywhere! And no – it’s not because of V-day. I was in the shower one morning and two of the droplets on my shower curtain made a perfect heart. I point this out because it was such a perfect looking heart and I've never seen droplets look that way! Then I was washing my hands at a public sink and the reflection in the handle made a heart. It was the combo of shadow and the person behind me and light and it made a perfect heart. My girls were curled up on the couch together, which they rarely do anymore, and they were a perfect heart shape. Of course they moved when I tried to take a photo. Then this post popped up on my newsfeed right when I was thinking to myself how funny it is that I see hearts everywhere:

So maybe….just maybe it may be coming my way???? I don’t know, it may be false hope but I think it’s cute and it’s making me smile. Hope my ridiculous ramblings keep you entertained!