Oh Online Dating...

Another update for all ya'll.

This may be the last one for a while.  I'm taking a break.  Yup.  I'm already so over it.  The routine is - I go on once a day - go through my "Matches" that are sent to me and either "Hide" or "Block" (sorry dudes I accidentally blocked due to my trigger finger!!!).  Then I try to pick a couple to "Start Guided Communication" with.  Forget it.  I'll still go through and Hide and Block but no more starting convo with these dudes.  If they're interested they'll start it with me.  I'm pretty jaded already so I at least need to just step away from caring so much for a few months.  It's starting to make me feel bad.  But here's a recap of the latest fails.

Went on a date with Broseph.  I referred to him as this because he kinda seemed like a frat boy douchey dude.  But the stuff he put in his profile and our email exchanges weren't douchey so I scolded myself for being judgmental.  But yeah - Broseph.  We don't text to much when he suggests meeting up for happy hour.  Great.  We make a date for a Tuesday night.  He chooses the Circle.  GREAT!  I can walk!  I recycle my Alaska date outfit.  I arrive.  He's late.  Why are they always fucking late?  I'm standing out front of Citrus.  He texts me he's parking.  A couple min later I see him drive by me.  You liar.  You're not parking you asshole.  I recognize your car because you have a picture of it in your profile.  Convertible Corvette. I'm already annoyed. (He may not be a douche, he may not be a douche).  All I'm thinking is

DOUCHE.  Anyway.  He arrives.  He's short but I knew this.  I was prepared this time.  I wore flats.  He was at least stocky unlike the wee man from Dating Blog #2.  We have an awkward hug hello. He seems to have trouble making eye contact.  We sit on the patio.  He's kind of an ass.  Not hugely, but makes a snarky comment to the waiter that thankfully I don't think the young waiter heard.  He orders Jack & Coke.  He won't make eye contact with the waiter.  It's weird.  We talk, he warms up.  I seem to surprise him with most of what I say.  I think he was expecting an idiot and was surprised by this interesting super cool chick that is Jami.  Deal with it jackass.  I order us hummus because the waiter keeps asking us, and he says whatever, and I feel bad because we sat at a table rather than the bar which I would have preferred. Ugh. It's so apparent we're not into each other.  I want to leave.  Bill comes.  He doesn't take it.  Sigh.  I grab it and whip out my card.  I'm talking about something else and trying to be cool and not mention the bill hoping he'll say "I got it".  Nope.  I wait for him to throw his card in which he finally does after an awkwardly long time and the waiter takes it.  It's split.  My half was only $10 because I got the happy hour shit.  He didn't so his was way more but yet we split the bill.  Ugh.  We walk out together.  Awkward hug goodbye - he doesn't look me in the eyes.  He keeps looking around like something is going to jump out of the bushes.  It's like he's uncomfortable. WTF DUDE?


He mumbles something about maybe going to a comedy show.  He blocks me the next day.  Whatever dude.  0 for 8.

Mr. "Too Good Too Be True".  OMG.  A cute one.  Like this guy is really cute!!  He's not very responsive via the e-harmony chat crap.  I start to think he's just going to not respond like most of the dudes then out of the blue - BAM his phone number.  OMG!



We start to text.  It's easy!  Like, we fall into easy texting convo. (Is that a thing?)  He's funny, we discuss cute animals, emoticons, food (OMG HE COOKS), I ask about his current project he tells me he's a lead archaeologist on a solar panel project in Paso Robles.  WHAT!?  I'm in love.  I start imagining us holding hands and smiling at each other and all my friends so happy I finally met the one!  This lasts about .02 seconds because of course my over thinking brain starts to freak a bit.  This guy can't be for real.  We talk about meeting on a Friday.  I'll take work off.  (He lives far so a day date would be ideal)  OMG!  I'm excited but I'm worried that I'm excited.  The texting is joyous for a couple days - then - he mentions open relationships.  Um.

Wait. What?  I tell him I have no problem with that but it's not my thing.  He says he's not necessarily looking for that again.  Um ok.  The texting takes a weird turn.  Hi red flags.  A few days later he starts coming up with excuses to back out of the date.  Yup.  Too Good To Be True.  Fucker.  I blow it off.  I don't hear from him for 3 days.  It's cool.  I make my day off an awesome day off.  I get my oil changed, I buy a wedding presie for The Bennett's, I hit the beach and Mitzy and her little join me, then I have dinner with my rad friend Tully.  Fuck you non date.  He actually text me that day - I was stunned - and said he still wants to get together.  Uh Huh.  I respond nicely.  Sure!  Of course it's not going to happen.  I give a shit now anyway.  We're mutually ghosting.  0 for 9.

Mr. Clinical.  This guy was very "Here's exactly what I want" kinda guy.  Now, he's been around the bend.  He's got a couple of kids.  He was very straight forward but not a jerk about it so I did appreciate that.  I was a bit annoyed when he complained about paying.  Look dude - I'll meet you for like coffee or froyo or something.  Can you spring for a fucking yogurt?  Anyway - we text/email not to much and he wants to meet.  He's willing to come to me.  I suggest A La Minute.  I forgot this was Ice Cream not yogurt.  He makes a comment how unusual it is to have dessert before dinner.  Live a little dude.  Besides ( I don't mention it to him) but I already ate.  Because I'm a fattie and I knew you you weren't springing for dinner.

He's late.  Of course.  But only by a few minutes.  We get our ice cream.  FYI - the grapefruit sorbet with some reduction on it - not good.  I was trying so hard to smile and chat and eat this nasty ice cream.  So this date sort of felt like a job interview.  He would say "So on your profile you said...XXX"  Um - yes.  Can you stop mentioning profile?!  It's already so obvi we're on a 1st date.  The counter kids are amusingly watching and listening to our awkward convo as it is!



He was nice.  Not a jerk.  But it was weird.  We head out and he say's he'll walk me to my car.  I walked to the Circle so I explain I'm about a mile away.  He says he'll walk me part way.  Um...how bout I give you a tour of Chapman?  That's sort of on my way home?  I guess?  So we wander over to campus.  Now here's what I found odd.  He kept stopping me (like physically stopping me walking) to ask me about something - like the Olde Towne Architecture or a building or the history.  Now that's fine and all but he kept touching me.  Like - he'd stop me then put his hand on my back and leave it there for a second.  Again - not necessarily unusual but he KEPT DOING IT! 



It was weird.  As we strolled around campus I kept dancing around him making it look like I was super tour guidey but really trying to avoid his weird touching.  So - we got to a good parting point, we said goodbye, he kissed me on the cheek and said "Let's keep in touch".  Yeah ok. 0 for fucking 10.

So there it is friends.  I officially have no other prospects now.  No one is emailing me.  Dating gives me anxiety.  I'm signed up until March 2017 and I'll check it but I'm not participating as much as I was.  Can Norman Reedus just call me already?!

OC Night Market & some theatre...

A couple of weeks ago I saw a couple of pretty cool pieces of theatre!

My dear friend and sometimes director Dave directed 2 one acts by Linda McClean at The Garage Theatre called The Uncertainty Files & What Love Is - Based on a series of intimate interviews, playwright McLean talked with several Americans, transcribing their discussions (as well as the sounds around them of traffic, doors closing or a refrigerator humming) and created a one-act play about the uncertainty of the future, the hereafter, about love and about ourselves.

The 1st piece was my favorite.  It was What Love Is.  Karen Kahler and Bryan Jennings were fantastic!

The play broke my heart.  The acting was fantastic.  Victoria Marcello was also great but Karen and Bryan were wonderful.  I think it hit home for me because I felt like I was watching my grandparents.  The story is basically about how much they love each other but old age and a stroke is affecting the relationship.  But the love doesn't die.  It's fucking beautiful.  Victoria plays the daughter who is taking care of them and it made me think of mom, right now, taking care of my gramma since Papa passed and how hard it is.  Honestly I don't feel anyone can understand how hard it is to go through something like this unless you've experienced it.  But lemme tell ya - they showed you.  I sometimes wonder if this would have been a freaking awesome role for me....hell...I've got the emotional experience for sure!  I digress.  Bravo to the cast and Dave.  Fucking awesome piece and this moment right here is when I lost my shit.

The 2nd piece was Uncertainty Files and a movement, performance art piece.

Everyone was great!  The movement was interesting and I loved that guys played girls and girls played guys that it didn't really matter but rather was a cool story telling of all these different interviews.  The sounds in the background that were happening when the interviews were taking place was included in the sound from the show - super trippy but super cool.   Everyone was lovely.  Great acting all around for sure!  My only complaint was I felt this one was a bit long.  I feel it could have been half the length.  It did get a bit repetitive but otherwise it was really fun to watch.  Props to the bright awesome costumes too!

My next piece of theatre was that same weekend.  Terri and I hit up the Fringe Festival to see my amazing friend Angela's piece called I was Hamlet.  She had done HamletMachine a while back and this is sort of a re-imagination of that show.  I love her work.  This was another movement performance artsy piece.  There were no chairs, us audience members just walked into the room and sort of all stood around. We were told to take pictures, video, enjoy.  The actors wandered in and out of the crowd.  It was really odd and beautiful.  My friend Jeff, Sayaka, and Andrew were in it and another friend Angel was playing Hamlet.  They were all awesome!  Jeff and this gal Katie did some fantastic acrobatic stuff that I loved.  Angel was fantastic as always.

I got tied up.  Yup.  HAWT.  That's me in the background.

The play took a turn about halfway through where Angel threw off is costumes, the lights came up and he broke off into a political rant followed by a prayer to the iPhone which we were all told to film.  I chose not too, I'd rather enjoy the piece but it was fun seeing all the video after the fact.  Really great piece.  Loved every bit of it!  I think you can see this - here's a link to one of the many FB Live videos (With me in it!) Video

Next up - OC Night Market!  One of my favorite events!  Noel, Jill and I went last year and were set to hit it up this year as well!  I might even go again in August I dig it so much!  This event is all food trucks and art vendors!  So much fun!  The key is to get there early.  I noticed that alot of the times it takes quite a while for your food to get made.  I can't imagine how crazy it gets later in the evening when the lines are longer.  I also failed to get too many pictures of Noel & Jill's food because we kind of split off alot since it was taking a bit to get the food, so usually they had devoured their food before I could get a snap or a bite! Ha ha!  First up was 901 Fried Skewers.  I got me a lamb & a pork skewer.  Unfortunately they were a bit too spicy for me.

We of course had to get our dance dance lemonades we call them from Main Squeeze.  They always have a cool little light up ice cube and fresh fruit!

Strawberry for Jill

Watermelon for Noel

Blueberry for me! (And it was damn windy!)

Next up was my absolute favorite of the day.  Pork Belly Sandwiches from Belly Bombz.  So. Damn. Good.  The staff wasn't very friendly but the food made up for it.

GET IN MAH BELLY!

After this Jill got some garlic cheese waffle thing.  No picture but I have to say - it was pretty good!  Tasted like garlic french fries!

Next up for me was some good old Sushi from Sushi Studio Arts.  I had this last time.  I'm normally hesitant to get sushi at food trucks or festivals but not this time!  So good!  They had a special for the Market which was a Yellowtail Hand Roll.  Um. Yes.

Jill and Noel opted for these Bun things.  I wasn't a fan.  Way too doughy.  They were filled with ground beef.  Not horrible but not my thing.

Last up for me (By now everyone but me was full because I'm a fattie) was some beignets! I needed a dessert right?!  So beignets won out!  They were yum!

I was trying to be good but of course I sucked into some pretty cool art.  I love to purchase things that are unique so I splurged and got a really need piece from Elizabeth Michaels.  It's a painting on a metal tin circle.  I love it!  I also fell in love with Audrey Miller.  Her stuff was so cute and unique!  I bought just a little print and a couple magnets but I have her info!

We ate our fill, bought some art and headed out before it got too crazy!  Another perfect OC Night Market Trip!  I love these random events! 

So I did a movie...

Well, I shot one scene for a movie.

It's a horror movie called Cold Blooded.

It's super low budget and a bit disorganized but it was fun!

A bunch of fellow actor friends have been a part of this guy's previous flicks and vouched for me for this horror flick, so I was offered the role of Sandy.  Sandy was supposed to be a college student but he change it to a TA since I'm old.  I was super excited because I love me some horror. 

My headshot they used

I showed up at the guy's house with my friend Keeney.  He's also in the movie but tagged along for my shoot to help out and keep me company. 

It was an extremely hot day and we were shooting out in the middle of San Bernadino somewhere. 

One of our actors didn't show up.  The dude that was supposed to play my boyfriend.  Welp - those few pages of lines I memorized just went out the window.  We came up with an alternative plan and shot that.  It was all pretty much improv, which I am not good at, and we shot the scenes. 

1st scene - me and the 2 other college kids resting on our hike.  Our other college kid (the missing actor) is off taking a shit somewhere.  We split off.  We're using a goPro - so sadly I'll never be able to actually watch my scene - I'm alone - have a lame few lines to the camera and I hear a noise.  "Guys?"  "This isn't funny"  "Where are you?"  You know, the typical I'm about to die lines in a cheesy horror flick.  Here comes one of the kids - disemboweled and missing an arm.  Lots of screaming as he falls on top of me.  I push him off...hear something...goPro over to my other dead college student.  Scream.  Die off camera.

I was little sad to die off camera and even more sad it was a goPro so you probably don't see me get bloody at all.  They used real animal guts which smelled awful and that scene took way longer than it should have in the heat, with the flies and the smelly guts and blood but it was still fun.  I wish it was more of a cooler death scene but we had to sort of wing it since the original plan was shot to hell due to missing actor. 

The crew was super cool and called us troopers at the end of the day.  The other two actors were super sweet and fun to work with.  

Home and right into the shower.  But hey - I'm in a horror movie for like 2 seconds!

This is Charles.  He plays Ben.  Ben dies.

That's our DP Cesar

The Talent.  Yup.  Sara, Charles and me.  We played Carrie, Ben and Sandy and are about to die.

Chasing the shade

This is when we arrived.

Our 1st scene

Poor Carrie!  Sara was as trooper laying there forever!

I figured I'd post a pic of the guy who was supposed to be my boyfriend and I got to make out with.  Sadly that didn't happen and twisted our shoot day into a lot of improv and winging it.  He had shot this scene a few weeks prior cuz he's the one that is still sort of alive when the lead actors come across him. 

Wrap.  I missed the memo to look cool and was just happy.

Rugged Maniac 2016...

Alex enjoyed the race so much last year that he wanted to sign up and do it again this year!  SO - of course I was in.  He invited his brother and three other friends of his.  So Jami ran with the boys this year.  2 of the friends missed our wave but met up with us somewhere along the race. I brought my little camera and we all traded off taking pictures (Which I'm glad we did because Rugged Maniac got like none of us, dammit).  I was the only veteran.  Alex has one under his belt but the rest of the boys were virgins.  It was a blast!   Since you all have read these a bunch before I'll just post the pictures with some captions!  Enjoy!

On our way - Robert has already passed out!

Walter Boys Sandwich

Robert is a little worried

This was like 3 minutes in.  We were already hot and dying.

Look like you're running!

It was hot

Mitch was hot

Why you taking a pic of my backside?

That ant was THIS BIG!

So happy. 

Pretending we're running

Robert actually had an injured swollen elbow but he was pushing through the pain.

Alex was not.

Bromance

Seriously guys - stop taking pics of my back.

Rad

This is Dax - he joins us later

This is Judd - he joins us later too!

Alex's fancy Rugged shot

Backup at the balance beam

The boys are a little unsure

Robert finds confidence

He begins

He falls

The guy made me dance since I was a Weeple.  This was my attempt - made it across like a boss tho!

Easy Peasy for Mitch!

Walking

Still walking

I'm a bit short.  Alex had to give me a leg up

He hearts Mitch

Robert is hanging in there!

One of my favorites

That elbow is no match for Robert!

I rule!

Alex in the back. Lol!

Mitch smokes the rings

Here I go

Not pretty

I did not smoke the rings.  I fell right here-ish

Go Alex!

Go Robert!

Hey it's the other guys! Hi Judd and Dax!

Judd smokes the rings

Dax smokes the rings

Then does some weird twisty turny moves

Our team is whole again

Not sure what the eye thing is...

I don't know...

These tall boys had an advantage over us shorties.

Yup

I actually killed this but the thing ended so you had to hop in the water at the end.  So much fun!

Like a boss

Mitch has mud weird places

Alex might cry

Judd is excited

Alex hates these most of all

Pull Dax out!

He really hated them

"How do you pin these on?

Team photo!  Love!

Last one over buys lunch!

We hauled ass

Judd and I are the leaders

Judd and I were the winners

Waiting for Dax who was taking the pictures so he doesn't have to buy lunch

We're dying now.

No more sprinting

Why crawl?

Apparently something disturbed me on my elbow

I don't know

Flex those guns!

Go boys!

The new obstacle!  Sadly this is when the camera battery died.

Fire jump!

The boys in the back!

Dax competed in the pull up competition

Judd showed off his jumping skills

I love this picture

Team Awesome!

And delicious food and grub afterwards!