Kellys Beach Saturday...

I have come to realize I’m just not much of a camper anymore. Sleeping on the ground/eggshell or not hurts my back. You can hear everything in a tent and it’s really fucking dirty. But its cool - I can rally. I got up Sat morning only wanting to take a shower....as I stood in the doorless shower, naked, with other ladies waiting and watching (some watching very intently I may add…) - I stood trying to wait for the scalding hot water to not burn off a layer of skin...this did not happen. Now - side note - when I am over exhausted I tend to get a bit over emotional. All I wanted was a fucking shower...I gave up, shouted at T I was leaving and stormed out. I ran into the bro who asked the wrong ques, I went into my tent and proceeded to cry. After composing myself I had a thought...I threw on a bathing suit took my shower stuff went back and stood next to some hungover fellow in the 2 outside showers and took a "sort of" shower. At least I rinsed off. I headed back to the site - apologized to my bro and headed to the coffee bus where T had already ordered my coffee knowing me all too well. The funny thing was - the coffee was AMAZING. Who knew a white trash coffee bus could make such good coffee. I sat down at the site and Shawn and I thoroughly enjoyed watching the rest of the party wake up and stumble out of their tents. (Note to self...if I make it next year I'm videoing the waking up after a nite like that series) The rest of the morning consisted of everyone making lunches, travel booze drinks, blowing up rafts and getting ready for the big float. Did I mention it was about 105 again? Our noon bus was late...but finally arrived and we boarded the white school bus lookin thing that towed a giant rickety trailer for the floats and was probably about 100 years old. Our driver was Wayne - a large man with a confederate bandana and very sweaty. Oh and it was his birthday. I sat in the seat behind him scrunched between the wall and Ronnie and D on Ronnie’s lap. This gave Wayne ample view of D’s chest. I think Wayne got quite the b-day gift with the amount of times I counted him looking in the rearview mirror. The bus was filled to the brim, some others on laps and we headed out. Happy Birthday was sung to our buddy Todd and our driver Wayne. We were dropped off and we carried our rafts and all our crap down this dirt road (The kind of dirt when you walk it puffs up into giant dirt clouds) in the very very hot sun. Now.. I wasn’t sure what to expect on this float. We arrive and there's other folks there...a very large group of people trying to walk through trees to hop in the river. When I can actually see where we're going...I watch as our fellow party slides down an embankment, throws their stuff in the raft, leap in and disappear in the current. Um...where's the beach...I thought we'd wade out and this be an easier task. NO. Shane warns me this is the hardest part then its smooth sailin. Um...what?...and he disappears. The water was going so fucking fast!!!!! Ok. I can do this. I have an oblong raft, our lunch bag, my ziploc back of cigs, sunblock, etc, an oar and my bubba keg of Madres. I slide down the embankment, onto my ass of course, maneuver my stuff in, toss in the raft and jump in. I was told to stay to the right. I'm instantly flying to the left. I'm on my knees in my raft trying not to topple and also trying to row to the right. I hear friends screaming "to the right! to the right!!" For some reason rowing seems to be spinning me in a circle and I can’t seem to get it right. 'Then I hear screams and 2 girls in inner tubes - also out of control grab onto my raft. I can’t pull these women, but they don’t let go. "Help us!" they shout. I panic. Yup. I haven’t felt like this..well…I don’t think in my whole life. I have no control. I glance up to see the rock beach ahead I'm supposed to stop at, and Shane yelling at me "TO THE RIGHT!" Fuck this. I throw my oar into the raft, flop half way into the water and pray to God my upper body strength is as good as I think and start to paddle for my dear life. I manage to fight the current and get to rock beach before slamming into the left side with all the trees and shit that would have punctured my raft and sent me flying. They pull me and the other girls in; I stumble out, heart racing and turn to Shane - "FUCK THIS!!!!!! " He laughs - "That’s the worse part". The girls I “saved” hug me and move on. Bitches. I realize I don’t know how T did...she's on an inner tubey sitting float, I spin around and there she is. Fine. Big ol’ smile on her face. She sailed right to the damn beach. I look around and watch fellow rafters crashing into the rock beach, some laughing, some a bit pale like me. After a bit, a cig and some swigs I calm down. We head out. Now I can latch on to people, you can’t when you first get in - obviously! So I latch onto Shane/D's army like raft and figure they can do the work. Shane does - god love him. I help paddle and kick when needed, but the rest of the day I'm staying with them. The 1st part was just us; poor T was on her own but handled it like a champ. We all met up at beach 2. This was another embankment but an open space to stop and chill sort of. It was so damn hot. We took the Kelly's Beach group photo here, ate our lunches, drank, laughed and kept reapplying sunscreen. Then I saw a rope swing. Most people were too scared to do it. Hell, I can handle anything now! "I'll fucking do it!!!" Some folks ahead of me did not fare well, but one fellow back flipped. Ok...I can do this. I grab the bottom of the rope and swing out over the river and launch in. I rule. I got cheered by so many people. Yup..little rush. SO I did it again. 2nd time...not so graceful...swung into the tree branches a bit, but still pulled it off. I think I made Shane proud. We head out again. Now there are about 4 or 5 of us attached to Shane. Heading down the river was fun, it was relaxing in parts, but there were parts that needed work. You have to constantly be aware and row or paddle away from the current sometimes. Beach 3 was some dudes house. Ya – huge beautiful house right on the lake with an abnormally large front grassy area. Some other partier was telling us the dude sometimes grills for the river rats. We all hang there for a while, waiting for our party to get together again. Some think it’ll be fun to have a “roll down the hill race”. People are dancing, drunk, eating, laughing. I’m in an out of the water it’s so damn hot. We head off again. This time our group all attached to each other is probably about 10 people. We float down the rest of the trip. One of our buddies is passed out and richcochets off a wall – that made for comedy. About this time I have to admit – I was over it. 6 hours floating down the river was about 45 min too long. I was starting to shiver at this point; my alcohol level must have worn down. We roll right up to our site, climb out and pull the rafts onto shore as I go sprinting for a towel and some warmth. We all get ourselves together, rinse off make some grub and start drinkin some more. Most crash out early this night. I stay up for a while listening to “campfire” stories then call it a night. Right as I doze off, I’m awaken by about 15 people surrounding my tent with flashlights – some not even our people. “Look at it! It’s so cute! What’s it doing?” For the next 10 minutes or so I listen to people ogling over a baby raccoon apparently. I want to get out of the tent but its right outside my door! I then hear its musical noise followed by “Its raping that shoe!!!!!!!!!!”. Sigh. That’s my shoe. Those are my river shoes. Apparently getting violated by a baby raccoon. The little bastard then moves on I guess raping other shoes. Lord. A couple of hours go by and I cant sleep, so I get up again hoping to not come across this little creature and everyone else is out. I’m alone. So I wander around the whole campground, then by the river, then sit for a while contemplating life. It’s so quiet, so serene. I finally attempt to sleep again to no avail. Sunday we’re up, packin and out. We’re all tired, dirty, and happy. It certainly was an interesting trip